Robert Cialdini, PhD, writes of the psychological principle of consistency. He says that human beings are moved to do things that make them feel consistent with their previous choices, desires, and identity—even if they are painful. The Aspiration Pillar taps into this drive for consistency. Once you have clear aspirations and specific goals, and put …
Mindful Self-Discipline is about doing what is good for you. The challenge is, what is good does not always feel good; and what feels good is not always good. Therefore, we need to make decisions based on how things are, regardless of how they feel. For that we need to separate the search for what …
To meet your goals, you will inevitably need to let go of, or sacrifice, some instant gratifications or small comforts in favor of long-term gains and greater fulfillment. Your sacrifice, or offering, is the price you are willing to pay for what you want—it’s your commitment, your skin in the game. You cannot cheat this …
To achieve your goals and fulfill your aspirations, you need to make an offering. Your offering is the price you will pay for what you want—it’s your commitment, your skin in the game. The more you are willing to give, the more you are ready to receive. Often what we need to sacrifice are the …
Aspiration is the first of the three pillars of Mindful Self-Discipline. There are seven steps, as illustrated above, to developing an aspiration that is strong and clear. Here we begin discussing the seventh step, Make Your Offering, which is related to the virtue of sacrifice. To make space for the new, you need to let …
There are five main ways for developing self-belief and self-confidence. Focus on Success Remembering your past successes and achievements builds confidence by reminding you of how capable you are. You naturally build confidence and self-belief whenever you overcome difficulty. Look back on your life and see all the times that you accomplished something difficult, whether …
As we saw in Willpower Is Like a Muscle, the amount of willpower you have depends on your beliefs about willpower and about your capacity. Positive self-belief increases your willpower and your capacity. Self-belief is one of the greatest gifts you can give yourself. With it, self-discipline is possible; without it, it is not, for …
Ownership is the attitude that, “I am responsible for my life, my wellbeing, and my goals”. Ownership is power. You can never change anything that you don’t take responsibility for. The opposite of ownership is victimization, or feeling yourself to be a victim. It keeps you stuck, because you feel you have no control, no …
There is a simple test to figure out if there is self-sabotage in you—the Red-Pill Test. For example, if I am working with somebody that wants to overcome anxiety, I might ask: “Suppose I have a red pill here in my hand. Once you swallow it, you will never experience anxiety again. Will you take …
At this point in the Aspiration Pillar, if you have followed the exercises, you have identified and magnified one or more aspirations, translated them into SMART goals, and prioritized them by allocating resources to make them happen. Now it’s time to face the biggest obstacle—the one big challenge that is so powerful that it can …
Join the MindfulSelf-Discipline tribe to gain access to all free bonuses.
Join the MindfulSelf-Discipline tribe to gain access to all free bonuses.
